Saturday, June 1, 2013

Larger Than Life

I feel like a strangled cat
I know
You don't want to hear that
But here I am

I find a lot of times
I am too big for my own skin
Quite bursting at the seams
With exuberant energy

I need to be creative 
But there's no space for creativity
In this claustrophobic lifestyle
Dripping taunting irony in this ceaseless rain

And I know you say I should be myself
But sometimes MYSELF is too big for this mould
And with no room to grow
I am like a plant in desperate need of a new pot

The ghosts of my now shadow self
Keep me up at night
Shrieking and wailing the dirges of a hollow shell
Passion is gone

But there's no one to blame
Because this is how adults live
And while you still drag me around like a distracted child
These eyes are dulled already with the unmovable weight of helplessness

The world keeps turning
And we keep loving in that constricted space allotted by a broken system
But each night I am haunted and each day I am praying for any kind of alchemy
 Rescue me from this icy pool of shattered dreams

It's unfair because you and I are both porcelain dolls
Cast together with faults
Faces cracked
Fragments fallen away

And while I crave space
And intimacy
And purpose
And freedom
I feel the crushing weight of destiny

Cry out in the night when I alone can hear
I am still tormented by devils of my own making
I hope somehow I seem less broken 
Cradle you in my love
Shine outwardly with more light than I feel within

None of this is of your making
Little of it wrought by me
But both of us are puppets
The strings not cut away
Willing we dance together entangled
And like Pinocchio, the strings fall away

No comments:

Post a Comment